At Work:

A note on an employee's locker: "You have a new combination, please see a manger."

At Class:

Girl Reading Script: "....rhino-saurus..."

The script read-> rhinoceros.

At Work:

Woman: "Do you think this is cute?"
Man: "Honey, you could wear a plastic bag, and still be gorgeous."
Woman: "Yeah, but do you like these underwear."
Man: "Like I said, hun, you could wear a diaper and it would still be a low-rise cheeky."

At Class:

My teacher: "I consider myself an actor first, then a teacher, so I don't want to put myself up on a pedastool, or anything..."

Pedastool.

At Work:

"I want a big-STUPID-booty!"

*really loud, times 10

;)